Thursday, 22 March 2012
Last night a friend of mine walked up to me to tell me all about his plan to travel abroad for an MBA degree program. Im always eager to share my experiences about travelling so that people have insiders point of view about the united kingdom and we got to talking. Over the course of the discussion i realized:
A. He didnt know what he wanted to do B. All he knew was the
USA was God’s own country and he wanted go there. C. He hadnt learnt anything really in the 5 years he had been working in the consultancy he was working in and what’s more going to work had become downright depressing for him because he had a feeling he wasn't welcome anymore. D. He had no idea where he would be in a couple of years and what he would do with the MBA, all he knew is it would look “correct” on his CV. I got sadder and sadder as we talked. My people, when did this happen to us? How did we all become so complacent and “switched off” in real life. So many of us are existing and no longer living. Yes we can party things up if we choose to but life seems to be passing a great deal of us by and we live our lives fulfilling the dreams of whoever’s voice is loudest in our ears.
It got me thinking, when did we stop being our greatest cheerleaders? When did we stop being responsible for our lives? yes our educational sector needs a radical overhaul but let’s not forget we all have a duty to ourselves. We all need to at some point at the other switch back on our brains. Like it or not, no matter how things decline, no matter how many degrees we buy or dont buy, no matter how many boot straps we lick to get promoted in the workplace – to get personal happiness and satisfaction that's lasts over time, you need to switch back on your brain and know who you are and what you want. Like my friend who i escorted to a number of university sites and gently persuaded not to dump hundreds and thousands of naira untop of “buying university admission” for a program that he had no idea what to do with or where he was planning to go, I’d like to be a personal life coach. Below are a few things I would like you to do:
1. First things first, reach back to the switch button for your brain and push on J yes, start thinking again!! No matter what or who you come across at work and where you work, its time to start thinking again. You’ll be happy and most definitely your boss will be too (note i said thinking not arguing)
2. Look around you, take a good look around you. How did you get here? Do you like where you are? Is it fulfilling any type of need you have minus the financial? Or can you not even see a financial incentive and just wanted to escape from the house?
3. OK, take a deep breath, and ask yourself, now that I am responsible for MY life again, what do i want to change around me to make me happier? At this point, Ill advise you to buy a notebook, not just any notebook but a really nice one that you feel befits you. Take your time and get a really nice one, invest a little money if you have to, and buy one that makes you really happy, even if it has bells and plastic kisses on it. Dont think about anyone but yourself when buying this notebook, this is your own personal slice of happiness. Now on the first few pages write 100 things that make you happy, at home and at work. Not what others say you like, not what you’ve been complimented on, but just things that make you happy. On the next few pages write 20 things that make you unhappy both at work and at home. Not what anyone else says but what YOU say makes you unhappy.
4. Now take these 20 things and go online and google them, chances are you’ll see thousands of entries and people complaining about just these same things so you now know you are not alone. Now google the same things but change the wordings so you are now looking for answers and solutions. Look for and read self help books and magazines. Pick solutions that jump out at you and write them all down. Do as many self help quizzes as you can find to give you more insight including any you find on career and personality.
5. Go back to your notebook and to a fresh page and start setting a timeline to addressing all the problems. None should be giving more than a year to solve and should have a start time of today! Go to phone, blackberry, notice board, laptop, etc and start setting up appointments, reminder dates, etc for your goals. Find a buddy or meet your significant other or best friend (but it must be a person who has always shown support) share abit of your timeline with them and make yourself accountable to what you have now set up.
Phew, we have finished our exercises so we can relax for a little bit. Now pick up your notebook and you should realize:
A. Just looking at your notebook should make you happy because it represents a little bit of what you love and what makes you happy; B. Looking at the first few pages should make you even happier as you remember all your blessings; C. The next few will not make you as happy but you should have a stirring within you to change things; D. The last few pages relieve you because it reminds you of your plan.
Tomorrow, we will be looking at translating what is contained within our notebook into sustainable action, bringing our plan to life, and taking charge of changing our lives and careers.
Have a great day every body!